It was Sunday morning, the morning after Daylight Savings Time, and I was sitting in the middle of Panera with my grande, hazelnut brew in my hands and my Bible open before me. Sitting in somewhat of a comatose state because not only had the brew not hit my blood stream, but also because Daylight Savings Time is just awful–ABSOLUTELY AWFUL.
Awful because Benjamin Franklin, jokingly suggested, that people wake up earlier in order to save on candles. UNBELIEVABLE. I can attribute my copious, caffeine consumption, my shortened fuse, my extra puffy eyes, my extra darker circles, and my children awake at the butt-crack of dawn to a joke about saving wax?!??! SERIOUSLY?!?! All over the world, mamas simultaneously curse Franklin from their beds and yet soberly remember that the man did invent electricity, which kindly fuels our Keurigs and hair dryers. Thank you, Benjamin, and yet…could you not have joked?!
Anyway, I was sitting there with the Word open before me, feeling not only overwhelmed by my physical exhaustion, but also a tad consumed with the tasks and changes before me. My week was busy; my planner was full; and I was wondering how it was all going to get done. One child was being extra whiny for the past few days; one child was extra selfish as of late; and one mama was a little irritable and a lot tired. And on top of it, sitting there with this looming recognition that at any point, we could be called to parent another child–a child in crisis and in need of a home.
This sister was tired before the week even started.
Thumbing my way to the next portion of Scripture I would be studying that morning, I found “Psalm 36:5-12” typed across the page. Rifling through those paper-thin pages of the best book ever written, I found my starting point and began reading.
Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. Your righteousness is like the highest mountains, your justice like the great deep. You, LORD, preserve both people and animals. How priceless is your unfailing love, O God! People take refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house; you give them drink from your river of delights. For with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light.
And do you know what stood out to me? The very thing that caught my heart’s attention?
The possession of the provision!
They [His people] will feast on the abundance of YOUR house; you give them drink from YOUR river of delights...
Whose abundance do we feast on? Whose river do we drink from?
YOUR house and YOUR river.
And as quickly as the Lord pointed out the possession of the provision, my mind was drawn to the Lord’s prayer in Matthew.
Give us this day, our daily bread…
Immediately, my heart felt a wave of peace and thoughts of truth came pouring forth from the Spirit who dwells within my feeble frame.
[Jessica, it is from His abundant house that you will feast; it is from His river that you will drink, and He will give provide it daily…as you need. You don’t have to conjure up the provision and you don’t have to supply the abundance because HE’S GOT IT. You don’t have to “plan enough” or “be enough” or “feel enough” because HE’S ENOUGH. The provision is from Him and through Him–not from my house and not from my river.]
And as I sat and thought about the way that He faithfully delights to preserve and provide for His people (the ones who take refuge in Him and acknowledge their inability to satiate their own hunger and their own thirst), I had this thought about the types of “bread” He provides for His people.
Now this might be a little weird, but track with me; I shared it with a girlfriend and she seemed to follow but then again, she might have been politely nodding. Who knows?!
I had this thought that maybe, just maybe, His “daily bread” isn’t the same every day. Maybe His “daily bread” is in accordance with my need, which changes from day to day and season to season. Maybe His “daily bread” meets my hunger and thirst right where they are, matching the deficits I bring to each day and each task. Like maybe His “daily bread” looks like a CROUTON some days. And maybe His “daily bread” looks like a SLICE on others. And maybe His “daily bread” looks like a BAGUETTE sometimes. And maybe, just maybe… His “daily bread” looks like a GIANT LOAF OF SOURDOUGH?!?!?!
And as I sat there in the middle of Panera, surrounded by all types of artisan breads, I marveled at the many forms of His gracious provision for me–the “daily bread” that tumbles from His house, and gurgles from His river, and meets me in the middle of my needy hunger and dependent thirst.
And much like the psalmist who penned these words, I found myself uttering the words from verse seven, “How priceless is your unfailing love!”
HOW PRICELESS IS YOUR UNFAILING PROVISION OF DAILY BREAD!!!
Because no matter what my needs are today, or tomorrow, or the day after next, I can be confident that when I choose to rest in the possession of His provision, I will lack NO crouton, no slice, no baguette, and no loaf. EVER.