Yes, We Realize…

If I could respond to all of the concerned sentiments and noted worries of well-intended souls about the realities of fostering/adopting, and how that could affect both our family and this child, this is what I would say…have said…and will continue to say (Lord willing, with both humble honesty and gracious truth):

Yes, we realize that we have no clue what we are “getting ourselves into.”

Yes, we realize there’s a potential that our family life will be disrupted.

Yes, we realize that there’s a possibility that things will get messy and ugly.

Yes, we realize that this child may not immediately connect with us.

Yes, we realize that we may not immediately connect with this child.

Yes, we realize that this child may have problems (both short and long term).

Yes, we realize that this change and transition may be difficult for Caden and Evie.

Yes, we realize that we will be extra busy and maybe even overwhelmed.

Yes, we realize that we may not know the genetic, medical, mental health, and familial history of this child.

Yes, we realize that this child may not be white.

Yes, we realize that there’s a possibility that this non-white child could possibly stir our family to address areas of struggle and face hardships that we wouldn’t face otherwise if he/she was white.

Yes, we realize that the biological mother could have engaged in risky behaviors during pregnancy.

Yes, we realize that these risky behaviors may have an affect on this child.

Yes, we realize that our house is small and will get smaller if we add a child.

Yes, we realize that we have NO clue if this child will be resentful, thankful, sad, happy, or mad because they have been placed in our home.

Yes, we realize that it may sound risky and maybe even dumb.

Yes, we realize that it could put a strain on our relationships, our time, or finances, and our comfort.

Yes, we realize that there might be times when we doubt, fear, and maybe even question our decision to foster/adopt.

Yes, we realize that others have had “horror stories.”

Yes, we realize that we are potentially signing up for a life-long discussion with this child.

Yes, we realize that drug addicts, sex addicts, and alcohol addicts may be a part of this child’s family tree.

Yes, we realize that we might not be a forever home for this child.

Yes, we realize that we might be making our lives “harder.”

Yes, we realize that this child may face difficulties that our other children may not have to face.

Yes, we realize that this process will probably hurt…a lot.

Yes, we realize that there are going to be hard days, long nights, and maybe even unknown years.

Yes, we realize that there are no guaranteed outcomes.

Yes, we realize that we are already blessed with two, healthy biological children…”one of each.”

Yes, we realize that our faith will probably be tested.

Yes, we realize that all these things and more could happen.

Yes, yes, and yes!

And YET…we believe that following Jesus and living-out the Gospel doesn’t always look and feel like safe, comfortable, and easy. 

May God get ALL the glory for ALL He chooses to do (or NOT do) in and through us as we put one foot in front of the other, following Jesus every step of this fostering/adopting path…no matter where the path may lead, no matter how the path may feel, and no matter how the path may appear to others.

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2 thoughts on “Yes, We Realize…

  1. Haven’t looked at your blog in ages, but I saw this post about adoption/fostering, and Oh.my.word.yes. to all of it! We’ve gotten all the same comments (it would seem) that you have, and “Yes, we realize.” But this is obedience. And obey we will. Noticed you were knocking holes in walls as part of your journey. Us too! Don’t be afraid of the mess, physical, emotional or spiritual; God will give you all the mercy and grace you need to walk this path, one small step at a time. Oh how I’d love love love to catch up!

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