32 Things This Mom Said Never (Part 2)

  1. “I’m so glad we ALL contracted a cold with flu-like symptoms on the 2nd week of school.”
  2. “I’m so glad we ALL contracted explosive diarrhea on the 3rd week of school.”
  3. “I love maneuvering two small children in a public bathroom stall where the door opens inward, smashing us all against the toilet and into the feminine product box.”
  4. “My favorite combo is white shirts and ketchup. THE. BEST.”
  5. “I love when you spend more time touching your lollipop than licking it; that’s SO fun!”
  6. “I get really excited when you have to go to the bathroom at the VERY same time as I do; it’s so neat that our bowels communicate like that.”
  7. “My favorite chore is cleaning while you’re in the house.”
  8. “My second favorite chore is cleaning the bathroom floor after you pee.”
  9. “I like sand.”
  10. “I love the way you jump on the arms of our couches; I honestly can’t imagine you ever using the couches in the way they were intended to be used.”
  11. “When you reach over at dinner and attempt to fish the ice out of my glass (with the very hands that you just used to pick your nose), I realize just how glad I am that I ordered my own drink.”
  12. “I hope I never sleep in past 7:30AM; waking up later is such a waste of daylight.”
  13. “I love knowing that 1/2 the clothes in the laundry basket have been worn for all of 20 minutes.”
  14.  “I love that we start preparing to leave the house at 7:30 so that we can be in the car by 8:00; we’re SUCH over-achievers.”
  15. “When I was pregnant with you, I would sit around and dream about the days when you would insist on bringing toys into the grocery store.”
  16. “My favorite place for Legos to reside? Right in the arch of my foot.”
  17. “I love how your voice does that really cool thing when we get in the car. You know. The thing where it gets really loud and really piercing and really surround-sound-like!”
  18. “Taking you to the grocery store is fun, but having you get your foot stuck in the grocery cart is SUPER FUN.”
  19. “When you throw yourself on the ground, I want to give you the world.”
  20. “I’m so bored.”
  21. “My house is so clean.”
  22. “My friends are so overwhelmed by my timely e-mail responses.”
  23. “It’s so nifty that our tub can dub as both a shower and a toy box; how cool!”
  24. “I love when you offer to comb my hair ears.”
  25. “I love when you simultaneously give me a hug AND wipe your mouth on my shirt; you’re the very best multi-tasker…EVER!”
  26. “I really like it when you pull on my clothes to get my attention; it makes me feel SO wanted.”
  27. “Honey, can you just pour me 1/2 a cup of decaf coffee? I’d really hate to be over-energized.”
  28. “I’m so impressed by how little toilet paper you use on such a consistent basis.”
  29. “When you get bigger, I’m really gonna miss crawling under the table to retrieve your fallen cup; I really do hope that your dad starts dropping his cup multiple times during meal times or else I’m gonna have to focus on eating my hot food.”
  30. “I love climbing through that germ-infested tunnel to find the socks you tore off; it kinda feels like a treasure hunt!!!”
  31. “I feel so special when I’m the only parent who forgets to bring snacks and drinks to the park.”
  32. “I can’t wait to be that mom in 20 years who forgets that life was sometimes hard with littles and tells every other young mama how much I loved EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF IT, which is exactly why I’m documenting all these precious moments that I’ll miss after I blink!”  🙂

For a few more smiles, click here for PART 1 of THINGS THIS MOM SAID NEVER.

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2 thoughts on “32 Things This Mom Said Never (Part 2)

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